FAT LEGS - "Ripe for the Harvest" CD-R (self-released)

What do I know about the husband and wife duo called FAT LEGS? Almost nothing! I've been in contact with Danny Milanese/FAT LEGS through email since this past summer. I even put out a split tape with them (scroll down a few posts for more info on that). Still though, I feel like I know nothing about who they really are. Why do they seem so mysterious? Am I the only one who thinks so? They seem like very nice people. I'm pretty sure the mystery of FAT LEGS is part of what draws me to them. Well, that and the fact that they make some very enjoyable, very unpredictable noisy music.

On "Ripe for the Harvest", FAT LEGS have created their most cohesive set of compositions yet. These four tracks take you on an incredibly haunting reverb-soaked journey through the way-the-fuck-out-there mind of Danny and his wife, Tiffany. Very seldom is DIY abstract music this well thought out... this conceptualized. As soon as the first track, "Sickle Cell Anemia" hit the one-minute mark, I could tell that this disc wasn't going to be leaving the CD changer for a while. All four tracks are full of buried drones, manipulated tape hiss, slo-mo synth slime, and an ungodly amount of reverb. The haunting ambience is overwhelming at times. This is definitely the slowest and most meditative I've heard FAT LEGS yet.

After listening to this CD 3 times in a row I've decided that this is essential listening for any fan of DIY homemade noise/drone. Expect to hear more from this band in the future. Grotesque cover artwork by Dan Milanese (as always). This CD-R is was put out in a limited edition of 50 copies. Chaoz Records (Netherlands) also helped put this out as a net release (so you don't have to feel too bad if you miss out on the CD-R). myspace.com/thefatlegs

-FRED

SUBURBIA MELTING - "Tired of Waiting" CD-R (Smell The Stench)

Illinois native and recent Portland, OR relocater, Andy Quitter (a.k.a. SUBURBIA MELTING) is back with an awesome CD-R of unreleased (collab.?) sessions recorded in late 2005/early 2006. Alot of Andy's recent recorded and live work has been dominated by the use of his beyond brutal homemade "spring bass" (which is exactly what it sounds like) but I think these recordings were done before the building of the spring bass was completed. What we have here are 8 untitled tracks that can get pretty hectic at times but stay mostly in a psychedelic, sci-fi sludge. I hear contact mics, strange percussion, squishy circuits, tea-kettle electronics, and (guitar?) feedback. This stuff isn't as balls out violent as the other SUBURBIA MELTING recordings I've heard but that doesn't mean it's any less enjoyable. "Tired of Waiting" is actually one of the more interesting noise releases I've heard in recent months. It comes off as being much more exploratory than the straight up harsh noise that SUBURBIA MELTING is known for. It's definitely more "musical". The packaging is nothing fancy however. A black & white inkjet printed single-fold cover in a resealable plastic envelope. The CD-R is a store bought thing with a small hand written label stuck to it. Judging by the rate in which SMELL THE STENCH puts out releases, I can understand the simple packaging but I still appreciate a little more effort. Fortunately, the quality of the music more than makes up for it. This is an excellent release. Recommended for any fan of noise or experimental improv. geocities.com/discodumpster & smellthestench.net

-FRED

FISTOPIA - "Destruction Fuck!" Deluxe Edition CD-R (Total Vomit Records)

This is my first encounter with Alberta, Canada's FISTOPIA. Judging by the CD's cover I was expecting some sort of perverted hi-fi professionalism. Shit, was I wrong. This CD is nothing but cheesy movie soundbites and beyond brutal lo-fi harsh noise. Heavy use of contact mics and what sounds like a mile long chain of distortion pedals. And with that said, it's pretty fucking enjoyable. I know almost nothing about the mind(s) behind FISTOPIA but it sounds to me like they're influenced by a lot of early '90s noise/gore/porn grind. The heavy use of sample intros followed by trashy overloaded chaos is what tipped me off. Mind-numbing but not mind-blowing. Comes packaged in a standard jewel case with a laser printed card-stock cover and (for some reason) a picture of the Teletubbies (dressed up as KISS) on the tray card. After some internet scouring, I've determined that what I have is actually the "deluxe edition" of this release. The basic version comes with a different cover in a slim CD case. Still worth checking out for fans of juvenile lo-fi harsh noise and gore grind (er... minus the grindcore). Also, they spelled marijuana wrong in the liner notes. Awesome.
myspace.com/fistopia & myspace.com/totalvomitrecords

-FRED

TWO NEW TAPES FROM BLASTBEATS FOR FREEDOM

bff5- THE TWO-YEAR CURSE / JOSEPH ANDREOLI - split c21

Santa Cruz, California's Federico Avila (a.k.a THE TWO-YEAR CURSE) and JOSEPH ANDREOLI team up again for another 10 (ish) minutes each of experimental improvised sound.

JOE ANDREOLI's guitar is so effected, the signal so damaged it sounds like a glitched out fucked up computer breathing it's last breath... whirring it's last whir. He could be boning up on his mixolydian shredding skills or he could be cramming the neck of his guitar into the cartridge slot of his calecovision. Who the fuck knows? Alien shred on the fritz.

For the first time, THE TWO YEAR CURSE does a 180 and uses all analog recording devices to capture all digital instrumentation (rather than the other way around). Free improv electronic drum-kit blasts break through the seams of spastic laptop generated feedback clatter. "I nearly broke the track-pad on that fucker!". Limited to 50 copies.



bff6- THE TWO-YEAR CURSE / FAT LEGS split c30

FAT LEGS, the mysterious husband and wife noise duo from Alberta, Canada rip out 15 minutes of beautiful female vocals, hideous male vocals, distorted keyboard damage, and zoned out electronic scuzziness.

After Fred Avila's recent forays into heavily edited, complex as fuck, mapped out recordings he gives up and goes back to basics. These are THE TWO-YEAR CURSE's most stripped down recordings yet. Slimey bubbling feedback kept at a simmer collides with non-stop brute force electronics and pissed off vocals that are more microphone feedback than human voice. Limited to 33 copies.

$4.00 ea. ppd in North America / $7.00 for both
$5.00 ea. ppd everywhere else on earth / $9.00 for both
paypal to blastbeatsforfreedom at yahoo dot com

Distros get in touch for wholesale
Cheapskates get in touch for trades (ha!)

SPOTLIGHT :: CRANK STURGEON

It feels good to finally update this thing and what better way to do it than with some reviews of the wacky dada-riffic noise and all around fishiness we've come to know and love from everyone's favorite contact mic abusing man-fish... Harpswell, Maine's CRANK STURGEON. CRANK has been recording and performing live since 1992. He also hand-makes his own line of super reliable high quality contact mics (of which I own 2). Check out www.cranksturgeon.com to learn anything you'll ever want to know about CRANK STURGEON and life in general. Exactly 2 months ago CRANK sent me a package containing the following...


NOVASAK / CRANK STURGEON - split CD-R (Swamp Of Pus)

NOVASAK starts this CD off right with a blistering track called "Right Hook to the Jaw", a nearly 7 minute excursion into contact mic'd funkiness and white out distortion. His second track sounds to me like a feedback loop improvisation. It covers a decent amount of ground but doesn't hold my attention as much as the imploding factory sounds of the first track and at 12 minutes it runs a little long. CRANK's first track, "gilituz-n-gha (meme)" brings the mood back up with a discombobulated mess of terrifying vocals, stereoriffic cut-up percussion, and intense carnival sounds. "For Hucket - Keep Her Limber" starts off a little more restrained but soon devolves into the clanging percussiveness and burping distortion CRANK STURGEON is known for. At 4:54 the distorted madness of the track gives way to a feedback tone that is so high pitched it's almost inaudible. My dog woke up from his nap with a terrified look on his face and tried covering his ears, no shit. The last track is a mail collaboration between NOVASAK and CRANK STURGEON. It's an interesting mixture of found sounds, spoken word, and junk noise randomness. CD comes sealed in a nice blue envelope with 2 full color inserts. Contact Swamp Of Pus for price and availability... www.swampofpus.com.


CRANK STURGEON / DENNIS NASLUND AND THE SUICIDAL ACCOUNTANTS - split c62 (The Terrorists Win!)

The beginning of "Protein Bliss" has me convinced that CRANK STURGEON is the TOM WAITS of noise. Maybe it's the awkward sense of humor that comes through in his music, maybe it's the old man crankiness of his voice, or maybe I'm full of shit. "Protein Bliss" is an expansive 31 minute noise epic in nine parts. CRANK pulls from the usual bag of tricks (absurd stream of consciousness vocals, random instrumentation, and beyond distorted cut-up contact mic fuckery) but is somehow still able to absolutely captivate the listener. I mean really, I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. DENNIS "the pink boxcutter" NASLUND (TTW label dude) has been kicking around the Portland, OR scene for a while now. On this release, he and 3 friends drop exactly 31 minutes of slow paced, thick & crusty, lo-fi as fuck noise. Vocals creep in occasionally as do some cheesy samples drenched in um... tonality but the bulk of this recording is dominated by syrupy distorted mush. I'm really digging the lo-fi brutal-assault mentality of it all but 31 minutes is a long time to keep this going, especially after the emotional roller-coaster that was "Protein Bliss". Tape comes sandwiched in between two card-stock "certificates of death" (from 1927) stapled together with a full color insert. "No really... thank you"... www.theterroristswin.cjb.net


CRANK STURGEON - "Bark King Haggard" c15 (Barfing Dagger Recordinds)

This release looks super nice. A standard tape case containing a clear c15 with a printed label on each side and a handmade insert wrapped in a beautiful piece of xerox art, the whole thing wrapped in a piece of binder paper with a child's (I'm assuming) magic marker drawing. Sound wise it's classic CRANK... crunchy, choppy, original noise that is absolutely gripping in it's absurdity. A big factor in CRANK's sound is the use of stereo panning and here he uses it to it's full potential. I love this shit and the fact that it's only 15 minutes long means that you can squeeze it in whenever you need a quick fix of spastic, schizophrenia. Limited to 47 copies... myspace.com/barfingdaggerrecordings


NOGGIN / ERIC BOROS / CRANK STURGEON and ID M THEFT ABLE - split CD (Manufracture)

Wow. Here's an interesting release. A real pro-pressed CD split between three different veteran artists. Bellingham, Washington's NOGGIN is the duo of Michael Griffen and Eric Ostrowski playing violin and guitar respectively. They've been improvising together as NOGGIN since 1993. Theirs is a very busy, meddling sort of free improv full of string brushing and scraping. These 3 tracks are probably my favorites on this CD. NOGGIN wouldn't sound completely out of place on John Zorn's Tzadik label though they might be a little noisy for the bulk of the Tzadik crowd.

France's Eric Boros (one half of the duo, VIALKA) has been here and there playing noiser musics since the early 90's as well. His track, "Noise Wakame" is a mash up of a bunch of live excerpts from his 2003 Japan tour. He employs everything from effected voice and electronic crackle to contact mic'd bong rips (that's what it sounds like at least). At times it sounds like CRANK STURGEON in slow motion. Because this track is made up of several recordings I found it a little disjointed and difficult to get into. It's an interesting listen but it still doesn't really come off as a fully engaging piece of music.

The CRANK STURGEON and ID M THEFT ABLE track is a live radio collaboration recorded for WMPG FM in Portland, Maine. It's hard to tell who's doing what exactly but I don't think it really matters. "...A Still Summer Evening's Border Crossing Impaired (w/ Stolen Almanac)(It's Probably the Beards)" is an exercise in complete oddball randomness. I would have loved to have been there when they performed this. I bet it was hilarious. What does it sound like? Well imagine if you will CRANK STURGEON in all his fishy glory. Now get some other weirdo who can do a dead on impersonation of CRANK STURGEON. Now get both weirdos going at the same time. It's fucking crazy right? Yeah, it's kinda like that... www.manufracture.net

-FRED

Mr. Lazy Bones

Sorry for the recent inactivity. I've been preparing a bunch of upcoming BFF releases and have simply not had time to sit and listen to/write about music. I promise there will be some new reviews posted very soon though... including a Crank Sturgeon artist spotlight and reviews of a bunch of shit from my huge stack of recent trades. Thanks for reading.

-FRED

SPOTLIGHT :: MYSTIFIED

Contact Mystified at www.mystifiedmusic.com to check availability for any of these releases. Watch for the split c30 w/ THE TWO-YEAR CURSE coming out on BLASTBEATS FOR FREEDOM in Winter ‘07/’08


MYSTIFIED - “Iron” CD-R (Turgid Animal)

The semi well known multi-national noise label (UK and Italy), TURGID ANIMAL put this CD-R out in an edition of 21. They have an obscene amount of releases for a 2 year old label. This is their 215th. The packaging left a little to be desired (but what do you expect from a label as ultra-prolific as TURGID ANIMAL?). The “Verbatim” brand CD-R definitely detracts from the overall look of the release (using storebought “branded” CD-Rs is sort of a pet peeve of mine). Fortunately the music more than makes up for the lackluster packaging. MYSTIFIED has been laying down the chill ass creepy noise jams for some time now and this CD doesn’t dissapoint. Contained are 10 song length tracks of haunting sound collages rife with chimes, bells, electronic farts, and looped insect noises throughout. The mixture of analog and digital sound creates an exremely varied, engaging listen that would be perfect as a horror soundtrack. I’m hearing buried tympani and processed field recordings mixed with programmed dissonance and digitized rainfall. There were only 21 of these act fast. It may be too late. This shit is way more ominous/threatening than a lot of the “harsher than thou” noise artists. Wow, I just noticed that I’ve used the word, “harsh” in almost every review I’ve written. I’ll try and cool it a bit from now on.


MYSTIFIED - "Drinking Hot Beer" 3” CD-R (Existential Cloth Recordings)

The cover art for this mini-CD is very colorful and would be quite beautiful if not for the extreme pixelation. The text is virtually unreadable! But again, this is another one where the music makes up for the packaging. This whole thing seems to be made up of lightly processed field recordings, some so untouched and left in their natural state that I find myself hearing certain parts and thinking, “This is supposed to be interesting?” yet for some reason I’m captivated. Sparse drums and accidental(?) melodies make appearances as do running water and traffic noise. I dig it. Seek this out if you like stuff that straddles fine line between “noise music” and random sound.


MYSTIFIED - “Mellow Utility” CD-R (Ambolthue)

Another full-length release from MYSTIFIED. Another 10 relatively short tracks of atmosphere and all around chillaxitude. This one is somewhat similair to the “Iron” CD-R on TURGID ANIMAL but way more relaxed and not as exploratory. “Mellow Utility” is a wonderfully fitting title. Rather than take you forward on an adventure, these tracks seem to hang around in their own fog not moving too much but creating space to float. Painting a picture. This is definitely more meditative than the other two MYSTIFIED releases featured above. Lots of machine-hum ambience and cavernous echo. Totally awesome relaxing ambient music. I think I could put this CD on repeat and go to bed. As a matter of fact I think I’m getting... kind of... ... sleeeeepy... ... ... Zzzz... Zzzz... ... ... Zzzz.

-FRED